Take Only As Directed

Oct21
2011 Leave a Comment Written by Dr. Rich

The late renowned golf coach Harvey Penick was known for likening instruction to medicine.  He would caution his students that when he gave them instruction to “not take the whole bottle.”  He also warned against taking medication that was prescribed to another student.  To avoid this, he never let a student observe another student’s lesson.

When referring to actual medication this advice seems so obvious as to not warrant mentioning.  But in the realm of sport instruction, including mental instruction, this is a trap that we often fall into.  Reading many instructional books and magazine articles is akin to walking into a pharmacy.  In most cases the instructions are sound and work very well for a specific performance issue.  However, blindly following that instruction is like taking a bottle off the pharmacy shelf and downing a few of the pills without a doctor’s order and without having any idea what illness the medication treats.  The result can be catastrophic to your game.

This advice extends to the mental game as well.  There are numerous books, CD’s and other materials with mental game tips and instruction.  While these materials have their purpose, nothing can replace individualized mental game coaching.  Just as you would seek treatment from a doctor for an illness or injury, consult a mental coach to maximize performance in your particular sport.  You will surely imptove much faster than trying to figure it out yourself, and you will also avoid the “side effects” of taking “medicine” for problems you don’t have!

Posted in Coaching, Parents

Mental Toughness

Aug16
2011 Leave a Comment Written by Dr. Rich

Recently, I have had two separate discussions, one with a high school football coach, and another with the parent of a young athlete, about sports and toughness.  In both conversations, the individual with whom I was speaking touted sports as the last arena for youngsters where the ”field” is not artifically altered in such a way as to prevent one side from “losing,” where it is conceivable that despite one’s best effort they may not make the team, and where score does count.  One of these individuals bemoaned the sense of entitlement present in some of our younger generation, where “showing up” should automatically lead to participation and all the accolades that follow.  Showing up may be 80% of the battle, but it’s not 100%, he said.

What I think both of these gentlemen were referring to is what is known in sports as “mental toughness.”  Mental toughness is the ability to overcome adversity.  It is perservering when things aren’t going your way.  It’s digging deep for that last bit of energy when you are exhausted.  And, it’s coming up on the short end of the score and deciding what you are going to learn from it, and whether the athlete is going to define this outcome for herself, or let it define her.

 This concept of mental toughness is perhaps where sports and life most overlap.  It’s where the lessons learned on the athletic field are just as valuable after the final whistle.  Improving at anything in life requires that you set your goals just out of reach, work harder than you thought possible, and to use setbacks as feedback for the next attempt.  No coach or parent should deprive their athletes of the important lessons that come from temporary failures.

The latest research suggests that mental toughness is actually a set of mental skills, rather than an entity onto itself.  As parents and coaches, nurturing the skills that comprise mental toughness is one of the most important roles we can provide for our young athletes.  It is a tremendouns responsibility and at times a tenuous line to tread.  To build mental toughness, we have to push our athletes beyond where they are, and sometimes beyond what they think they are capable of achieving.  But for optimum success, we need to do so in a way that is motivating, reinforcing, and in a way that builds rather than breaks down self esteem.  Mastering these skills is what sets great coaches apart from good ones, and great parents of young athletes apart from the rest.  And of course, a mental coach can help you learn these skills and show you the best way to teach them to your young athletes!

 

Posted in Coaching, Confidence, Mental Toughness, Motivation, Parents, Performing Under Pressure, Reinforcement

Taking A Break

Jul17
2011 Leave a Comment Written by Dr. Rich

 

Whenever we hear stories about an elite athlete and their rise to stardom, without fail we hear about the tireless devotion to their sport and hours upon hours of practice.  We are led to believe that they eat, drink, and sleep their sport, and it is on their mind every waking minute.  This then leads us to believe that any moment not spent participating in, practicing, reading, or thinking about the sport is time that our more devoted competitors are passing us up.  Taking a break from a sport is seen as weakness and flagging dedication.  But is it?

To answer this question, it is helpful to understand how our brain works.  In order for us to develop any new skill, we have to get new information into our brains.  We accumulate this new information through reading instruction books, coaching, practicing, and introspection about our performance.  These processes are mostly conscious and effortful.  Information first coming into our system is “raw” and needs to be processed.  Believe it or not, a lot of this processing is unconscious and happens without our direct effort.  It occurs when we are sleeping, and when we are not thinking consciously about our sport.  There is scientific evidence showing that students who take a nap right after studying remember the information better than those who remain awake!  Although you are sound asleep, your brain is still working hard at processing all of that information.  Our brains have limited capacity for this raw information.  the information already in the system needs to be processed before more information can be added.  Anyone who has tried to cram for a test in school can relate.  After a certain period of studying without a break, it seems like your brain is full and no more can get in.  The same is true for learning sports skills.

So, how long of a break (if any) do you need, and how will you know?  A mental performance coach can help you with the details as they pertain to your situation, but there are a few clues.  If you feel that you are putting in more than enough training and practice time but seem to be stuck, it may be time for a break.  Athletes may experience this as a prolonged slump, or as a plateau that they just can’t overcome.  This may present as a bowling average you just can’t seem to get above, or a defined level of performance in some other sport.  As for the amount of time you should take off, it will differ for everyone, and will even differ within a person depending on the type of plateau or slump you are in.  But one rule of thumb is, when you get to the point where you can go a day or more without thoughts of the mechanics or struggles of your sport popping into your head, you may be refreshed enough to return to your sport.  This may simply committing to not thinking about or participating in any aspect of the sport between seasons.  In more exceptional circumstances it may mean taking more time than that off.  And for some, it may be no more than a few weeks.  Rely on your mental performance coach to help you.

As a dedicated athlete, you may fear that taking time off from your sport entirely will result in losing skills and being even further behind.  If you are truly in a position where your mind is sludged up with too much information, thoughts about mechanics, and frustration, I can assure you that the time off will be more valuable than adding more to the pile.  As an illustration, consider an experience I had in bowling that I shared in a recent post (Mental Roadblocks: An Autobiography).  I desperately wanted to get better at my game.  I practiced constantly, and I can honestly say that nary an hour went by, EVER, that I didn’t think about my mechanics, my latest swing flaw, etc.  Partly due to frustration and partly due to other life circumstances, I stopped bowling for almost 13 years.  When I returned competitively to the game, I was instantly better than I was the day I quit!  In my first season back, I recorded my highest career game, series, and average!  Nobody will have to take 13 years off to get past a mental hurdle, but this illustrates how the mental cleansing was far more powerful than the effect of any skills declining during that time.  Your mind will remember what to do!

Posted in Coaching, Mental Blocks, Parents, Taking breaks

Identifying Your Child’s Ideal Sport

Jun20
2011 Leave a Comment Written by Dr. Rich

As parents, it seems like the time we spend changing diapers and washing bottles is transformed overnight to shuttling our kids to various sporting events, watching them play, and maybe even contributing as a coach or other volunteer.  There’s soccer and dance class in the spring that eventually gives way to swimming and martial arts in the summer, replaced by a few other activities in the fall and winter, and on, and on, and on.  During this time, we see our young athlete’s attention wax and wane, new activities are added to the list, and eventually there is not enough time to participate in everything that tickles the fancy of the eager youngster.  We think to ourselves “if only we can figure out for which one sport our child is best suited, we can channel all of that energy into a long-term activity that will bring happiness, wonderful achievements, and who knows, maybe even a scholarship!

If you read “The Talent Myth” on Mind For Sports, you already know that the idea of ”born” swimmers, golfers, baseball players, etc. is largely a myth.  Every world class athlete had to devote thousands of hours and perhaps millions of repetitions to achieve their elite level of talent.  What may be innate, however, is the child’s interest in a particular activity.  For it is only when they truly love the sport that they will find the energy and will to devote to practice, skill development, and overcoming adversity.

So as parents, how do we identify that ideal activity?  The secret is to quietly and unobtrusively observe your child.  What does he or she choose to do during completely unstructured time?  When they have access to any toy in the playroom or any piece of sporting equipment in the garage, what do they select?  What is the content of their dreams?  Who do they pretend to be in their fantasies?  If you sit quietly and just observe, your child will take you right to his or her ideal activity or activities.  Then, you nurture that love and interest with all of the other ideas presented on mindforsports.com.  You positively reinforce your child.  You help them focus on what they can control.  You teach him or her to manage fear and anxiety.  And most of all, you let your youngster have fun!  Allow your child to “play” with the sport, occasionally doing things that are unorthodox or  don’t seem to have any functional value (as long as it is safe).  As a child, I recall arriving early to a major league baseball game, just in time to watch several of the players involved in what looked like a football game with a baseball!  One player was throwing “bombs” halfway across the outfield to another player who caught it without a mitt.  Those big kids were just enjoying themselves with a baseball and field of grass before returning to the task of a professional sport.  They were doing what they loved.

As a final note, be prepared for the possibility that through this observation you may learn that your child’s true passion is not a sport.  That is perfectly fine.  Given how many adults there are in the world who are still searching for their true calling or passion, there is no greater gift you can give to your child than to help them find that passion, fully nurture it, and watch them grow and flourish!

Posted in Choosing a Sport, Coaching, Motivation, Parents, Talent

The Other Side of Fear

Jun15
2011 2 Comments Written by Dr. Rich

This weekend, we went on a family camping trip to Inks Lake in Burnet, Texas.  At one end of Inks Lake is “The Devil’s Watering Hole,” a swimming area surrounded by cliffs.  Our six-year-old daughter Anna was excited about jumping off the cliff into the water…that is until she climbed to the top of the cliff and looked down.  At that point, excitement was replaced with fear.  For approximately 30 minutes, Anna sat at the edge of the cliff, changing her mind at least a dozen times about whether she would in fact take the plunge.  I sat quietly next to her, gently encouraging her but letting her know that the decision was hers, and either decision would be fine.  At the end of the half-hour, she quietly stood up, softly uttered “I’m doing this,” and jumped into the water.

As I watched Anna go through this process of overcoming her fear and seeing the exhiliration on her face when I was reunited with her in the water, I knew that this moment was much more than a six-year-old deciding to jump into a lake.  She carried herself differently for the rest of the trip.  I believe she took an important step in her life about facing fears and the wonderful things that exist just on the other side of those fears.  That jump was also a teaching moment for parents and coaches, and a way to view youth athletics.

There are many experiences in a young athlete’s life that provoke anxiety and fear.  Stepping in the batter’s box for the first time, performing a gymnastics routine in front of a crowd, or stepping up to the free-throw line in a hushed gym with all eyes on you and the outcome of the game hanging in the balance.  The list goes on and on.  Regardless of the outcome, a child accepting that challenge is changed forever.  Their comfort zone expands and fear loses some of its power.  As the young athlete overcomes fear again and again, he or she begins to learn what great things exist on the other side!  There are home runs, great scores, and winning free throws.  But just as importantly, there is camaraderie with teammates, cheers of approval from parents and coaches, and perhaps most importantly the development of self-confidence that will carry that child to places s/he would never have otherwise ventured in life.

As coaches and parents, our job is to simply BE with our young athletes as they sit on that cliff.  We provide encouragement, we support them in their decision, and we let them know that whatever decision they make is fine.  But we also remind them of the importance of facing their fears head-on, and instilling in them the value of doing so regardless of the outcome.  The rewards come not just in the form of home runs and trophies, but in the satisfaction of knowing that they can look out over any cliff they encounter, and accept the challenge.

Posted in Anxiety, Fear, Parents

Defining “Winning” For Young Athletes

Jun10
2011 1 Comment Written by Dr. Rich

At a recent meet for my daughter’s swim team, I saw several youngsters who performed wonderfully in their events, but were nonetheless disappointed because other swimmers finished the heat ahead of them.  In every case the parents responded precisely as they should have, stressing how well they did compared to previous races, praising their effort, etc.  But alas, it was of little comfort to the kids, who just wanted to “win.”  My daughter is no different.  When she jumped out of the water after each of her events, her first instinct was to see how she fared compared to her fellow competitors.  So how can we help our young athletes to appreciate their successes, even if they perform better than their fellow competitors?

First of all, I am not going to suggest that outperforming others has absolutely no importance.  During our adult lives we are competing against others, be it for a good job, a promotion, or the favor of a potential mate.  But with the wisdom that comes over time, we realize that in order to enjoy some victories in our life, we have to focus inward rather than outward.  In other words, we have to work on improving ourselves relative to ourselves.  Time spent looking at the performances of our competitors or at their trophy cases is time wasted.

For parents and coaches of athletes, changing this focus will take time and effort.  Your child athlete will benefit from a regular dose of encouragement and reminders about the progress they are making, be it an  improved stroke, shaving a few seconds off their time, or even an improved attitude.  With concerted effort, your young athletes will start to focus on these internal benchmarks, and the victories and trophies will take care of themselves.

Posted in Coaching, Focus, Motivation, Parents, Reinforcement, Winning

Role Models and Sportsmanship

May15
2011 1 Comment Written by Dr. Rich

Those of you who have been following the NBA playoffs this season no doubt saw or heard about the Lakers’ unceremonious exit from the race, with very poor displays of sportsmanship by two of their players.  With the game quickly getting out of hand and elimination imminent, two of the Lakers players, Lamar Odom and Andrew Bynum were ejected for cheap shots that could have potentially injured opposing players.  Responses from the sports’ community ranged from outrage at these acts to sadness over Phil Jackson possibly ending his coaching career on this sour note.

From the perspective of parents and coaches of young athletes, these actions bring up the topic of professional athletes as role models.  Although the quote was made years ago, many of us recall the words of Charles Barkley: “I am not a role model.”  So, should we tolerate these actions in professional sports?  Are professional athletes beholden to young athletes to serve as role models?  Is it their obligation to refrain from illicit drug use, marital infidelity, and deplorable on-field actions?

Although this would make for a lively discussion amongst a group of sports fans for sure, I will present just one perspective, a stastistical viewpoint of a psychologist.  Scientists who study human behavior pay close attention to bell curves, also known as normal distributions.  For any skill or ability, the great majority of us are somewhere close to average.  The further the skill diverges from average in either direction, the fewer people you will find at those levels.  Professional athletes are clearly way above average in their ability, most of them beyond the 99th percentile.  So in a way, they are abnormal.  Abnormally good, but abnormal nonetheless.  We want our teams to have the very best players, so in a way we select specifically for great levels of abnormality. 

So, by choosing individuals who are so unusual in one regard, is it reasonable to expect them to be normal in all other ways?  Or to take it a step further, is it reasonable for these abnormally good athletes to also be abnormally upstanding citizens and role models?  I would say no.  This raises the question of what the relationship really is between athletic ability and moral character.  Are they positively correlated (i.e., those with great athleticism also tend to have good character), negatively correlated (i.e., great athletes tend to be below average in moral strength), or are these two traits independent of one another?  I don’t know the precise answer to this question, but from seeing the extreme range of sportsmanship and moral character across professional athletes, if I was forced to guess, I would guess that they are relatively independent of one another and depend on other factors.  As a society we can decide to demand a high level of integrity and character in professional athletes and have a zero-tolerance for any moral infractions.  But it would almost certainly decrease the overall level of athletic performance.  Everyone is entitled to their own opinion about this matter, but given the emphasis on winning and the ridiculous amount of money in professional sports, I wouldn’t hold my breath waiting for this to happen.

So, where does this leave us as coaches and parents of young athletes?  That’s right, it is our obligation to be role models for our young athletes; it is not Charles Barkley’s job.  And to take it a step further, it is our job to explain this process to our players.  When one of our players emulates some of this bad behavior, be it arguing with an official, delivering a cheap shot, or taunting another player, we can take them on the side and counsel them.  I think that most people would agree that athletes who exhibit these behaviors do not benefit from them.  If we were able to have a frank and honest discussion with Pete Rose, Tiger Woods, or Barry Bonds, I think they would admit that they succeeded despite their moral shortcomings, not because of them.  We can also point out to our players that for every star athlete who has struggled with their behavior, there are others that have done a pretty good job.  Regardless, we need to lead by example, reinforce sportsmanship, honesty, and other desirable personal characteristics, and be ready to step in quickly when a young athlete needs some guidance.

To conclude, I will leave you with a quote from the great golf teacher Harvey Penick who said “I learn teaching from teachers.  I learn golf from golfers.  And I learn winning from coaches.”  Hopefully, our young athletes will learn about winning in life through good morals and sportsmanship from their coaches and parents, too.

Posted in Coaching, Parents, Sportsmanship

The Talent Myth

May03
2011 Leave a Comment Written by Dr. Rich

When watching an elite athlete in any sport, it is tempting to conclude that the athlete was born with innate talent.  How else can you explain the seemingly super-human abilities of players like Tiger Woods, Michael Jordan, Derek Jeter, or Venus and Serena Williams?  When we then compare ourselves, our children, or the athletes we coach to these icons, we concluded that we obviously were not born with that level of talent, and have little hope of reaching similar levels of ability. 

Scientists have attempted to identify the gene trait, or biolgical marker that is responsible for excellence, not just in sports, but also in academic and artistic endeavors.  They have studied thousands of elite performers, comparing them to thousands of less accomplished counterparts.  Do you know what they found?  Nothing!  There is no innate trait or marker that separates elite perfomers from the rest of us.  Michael Jordan did not bound out of the womb dribbling a basketball.  In fact, as many of you may know, he didn’t even make his high school basketball team initially!

The truth is, no athlete ever reached world-class status without thousands of hours of practice and hard work.  Not Tiger Woods, not Michael Jordan, nobody.  Many of us have heard the stories of Tiger Woods hitting golf balls since he was a toddler.  Tiger surely logged tens of thousands of repetitions at a very young age, and has hit millions of golf balls in his life so far.

If there is anything hard-wired into these amazing athletes, it is likely a deep love for their sport and great enjoyment gained from practice.  There is no way they would have practiced and worked as hard as they did if they did not get enjoyment out of the process. 

So what is the lesson for all of us as athletes or the coaches or parents of athletes?  It is to follow and nurture the athletic activities you enjoy the most.  Don’t discourage a child athlete because they don’t seem to have innate talent.  Watch carefully the activities they engage in most and seem to enjoy, and reinforce and encourage their participation.  At the very least you are facilitating participation in an activity that is inherently enjoyable to that young athlete.  And who knows, you may be guiding the development of a budding world-class athlete!

If you are interested in further reading on this topic, I highly recommend the book Talent Is Overrated by Geoff Colvin (2008, Penguin Books).  As always, feel free to comment or email DrRich@mindforsports.com for more information.

Posted in Coaching, Parents, Talent

Understanding And Avoiding Choking Under Pressure

Apr26
2011 Leave a Comment Written by Dr. Rich

 

If you are a golf fan, you no doubt watched or read about Rory McIlroy.  If you didn’t, he is the young Irish golfer who was leading this year’s Master’s tournament by four strokes going into the final round.  Following rounds of 65, 69, and 70 however, disaster struck, and he shot a final round 80 to finish in 15th place.  In common sports terminology many people would say that he “choked” under pressure.  What does this mean?  Why does it happen?  And perhaps of most interest to competitive athletes, how does one avoid choking?

Choking is defined (ironically by a scientist with the last name “Masters”) as “the failure of normally expert skills under pressure.”  Scientists have referred to it as a paradoxical phenomenon, as the harder one tries, the worse they do.  Athletes and scientists alike have tried for decades to figure this out.  One theory seems to rise above the rest in terms of the cause, and ultimately the cure, for choking.

If you read my recent series on performance anxiety, you know about the learning process in sports in which motor skills become automated over time through repetition.  As they become automated, they require fewer mental resources.  Think back to when you were learning to drive.  If you tried to do anything else while you were driving your performance was horrible.  But now that you have years and years of experience, you can drive while doing a number of other things (changing the radio, talking to a passenger, etc).  Driving now requires only a fraction of the mental energy it once did, because you have an automatic mental program for that task. 

The problems begin when you try to control processes that are automatic.  If the next time you went out for a drive you focused hard on pressing the accelerator down precisely 1.2 inches, and turned the steering wheel exactly 1.75 times around to make a right-hand turn, your driving would surely suffer.  The same thing happens to athletes under pressure.  In an effort to give the best performance of their life, they try to control every movement, and by doing so, they short-circuit their effective, automatic processes.  The harder they try, the more controlled they become, and the results just get worse and worse.  Scientists refer to this process as “explicit monitoring,” because the athlete is monioring their every move, rather than letting it flow naturally.  This is likely what happened to Rory McIlroy on that fateful Sunday afternoon in Augusta, Georgia.

As you might imagine, or know for sure if you’re an athlete who has experienced choking, overcoming this obstacle is not quite as simple as “don’t try so hard.”  Every athlete’s situation will be somewhat different, both by virtue of what is going on internally as well as the demands of their specific sport.  However, a good mental coach can help you get to the bottom of your specific situation and help you develop techniques to perform well under pressure.  Drop me a note at DrRich@mindforsports.com if you have any questions or comments about this post.

Posted in Anxiety, Choking, Focus, Mental Blocks, Performing Under Pressure

Mental Roadblocks: An Autobiography

Apr17
2011 1 Comment Written by Dr. Rich

 

As a child, bowling was my passion.  I practiced every chance I could, attended camps, and took in every bit of information that my coach was willing to share.  I bowled in several leagues each year, and my Dad drove me to tournaments all over the state.  As high school drew to a close, I set my sights on making my college bowling team.  Despite my efforts and passion, I was not successful either of the two years I tried out.  No matter how hard I tried (and I tried VERY hard), something seemed to be getting in the way.  While bowling in leagues in college with the guys who did make the team, I always seemed to be a class below them, even though I knew in my heart that I should be at their level.  Frustrated and out of answers, I quit.  For 13 years.

My second stint at the game produced a huge surprise and one of the great lessons in my life.  I was now married, had a brand new daughter, and was starting my first job after graduate school.  Joe, my neighbor and now dear friend, asked me if I would like to substitute on his team.  I agreed.  I quickly realized that this time around I had absolutely no expectations, and there were many other important things in my life to occupy my mind beside bowling.   Substituting quickly turned to being a regular on the team.  At the end of that year, following 13 years of picking up a bowling ball maybe six times, I averaged 14 pins higher than I ever had in my life!  I also topped my high game and my high 3-game series by considerable amounts.  After 13 years of inactivity in the sport, I accomplished things that I was not able to in 13 years of concerted effort.  The mental garbage seemed to have disappeared.

Looking back on this entire process from the eyes of a psychologist, I realized that there are lessons to be learned and wisdom to pass on.  First, expectations and mental roadblocks can burden an athlete and preventing him or her from realizing their full potential.  It’s only when you release these burdens (yes, if you have them you are actively holding onto them and have the freedom to let them go at any time) that you can reach new heights in your game.  I was reading every instruction book I could get my hands on, trying every drill known to the sport, and obsessing about my progress (or lack thereof) day and night.  What I should have been doing is dedicating more time (a alot more time) to the mental side of things.  What also became apparent was all the time I had put in on my physical skills was actually being stored in my muscle memory and making me a better bowler.  The results were just being impeded by my mind.

Does this mean that you have to take a decade or more off from your sport if you become mentally stuck?  Of course not.  I learned the hard way, but you certainly do not have to take the same path.  If I would have sought out a good mental coach, I could have cleaned the mental garbage out of my mind and broken through to new levels of success much more quickly than I did.  Do I regret this roundabout path?  Not one bit.  My journey taught me volumes about sports and about life.  I wouldn’t trade it for 20 perfect games, or even a spot on my college team.  And perhaps most importantly, my experience gave me the wisdom to help other athletes struggling with their own mental roadblocks.

So, if you feel that something is holding you back in your sport despite heroic efforts, it may be time to talk to a mental coach.  As always drop me a line with any questions at DrRich@mindforsports.com.  If you have a similar story, I would love to hear it.

Posted in Confidence, Focus, Mental Blocks, Self Talk
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I figure practice puts your brains in your muscles. -Sam Snead, legendary golfer

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